| M*A*S*H is mostly cast.?There's a couple blank holes.?For instance, Dean Mercy Lodge, who needs to look and sound exactly how her name implies she would.?The lady is in her 50s-60s and is Dean of a major medical school in the northeast.?She is a by-the-book stickler.?Hair of iron and voice of steel.?Here are the rest of the group:
Gen. Hammond will be played by Jack Tyson, who reminds me of me, which is to say he is near my age and bald.?Pvt.Boone is Kip Hayes, and boy is this going to be an interesting experience for the both of us, improvising in rehearsals but trying to stay loyal to the script.?Wish us luck!?Bill Whalen is playing Col. Blake.?He offered me sexual favors.?I did him a favor and didn't have sex with him.?Bridget McCarthy is Austen Edwards...imagine, a redhead playing someone whose last name starts with "Mc".?What is this, realism or something??Janice Fury, in a burst of typcasting, is Lendsey Kersey.?Nepotism had nothing to do with her suav-y boyfriend getting cast as Hawkeye Pierce - Kurtis von Krueger just happened to bribe me, thankyouverymuch, so nepotism had nothing to do with it!?Sgt. Devine is Rey Munoz - because he loves me.?Louise Kimble is Debi Dunkerly, because she blackmailed me.?Frank Burns is Clayton Habecker, because my contract at PJC requires that if I don't use him at least every other show, I get fired.?Also because he's an ass.?And by that I mean donkey.?In fact, his full name is Donkey Hotee, and he has a fear of windmills, and is slightly dyslexic.?Slydexic.?Steven McHaley (Mc again) is Father Mulcahy, which just makes sense.?He also has my favorite line in the show.?It involves the word "Hoopla"!?Joey Rayfield is Walt, because he strikes me as capable of deep thought.?Trapper John is being played by Ethan Hatcher, because he brought a student organizer manufactured by Mead to the auditions.?Ricky Terry is ugly.?By that I mean he's unattractive.?So he is playing "Ugly" John Black.?Because his heart, it is black like the night!?Radar Reilly is Gary Russell, because his first name is Gary.?Think about it...creepy, huh??Duke is Adam Carroll, because his last name has a pair of ar's and a pair of el's, beating my three of a kind.?Pvt.Lopez is Jay Pastucha, because his last name makes me hungry.?Korean Woman 1 is Ollie Benjamin, who in real life is of Korean descent, but she is also a nurse, so I was torn whether, for realism's sake, to cast her as a nurse or as a South Korean.?Geography won out.?Other Korean characters, such as Ho-Jon, are being cast next week, hopefully.?We need a male in his?late teens, an older male, and at least 2-3 other female Koreans at least.?Ollie's mom may be able to recruit some folks from her church.?Go realism!?Lt. Nancy Phillips is Amy Sellers, because I'm buying.?Hot Lips is Jennifer King.?Or, to be grammatically correct, "Hot Lips ARE Jennifer King."?At least that's what the grammar whiz on my computer tells me by underlining the verb in that sentence with a green line.?Congresswoman Goldfart is Tana Olsen, because I ate beans.?Miss Randazzle is Kenzi Ongalo, because of her sparkling personality.?Brittany Verlaan, Jessica Bare and Morgan Reid will appear as triplets Mitzi/Fritzi/Agnes, replete with huge Dolly Parton wigs.?Wigs.?I said wigs.?Freak.?Liz Batista will be Lt. Liebowitz, Michael Miles is Capt. Oliver Wendell Jones, Brook Martin is Major Haskell, the shrink, because she's so tall, and rounding out the cast are Deanna Oakley, Grace Tyson, Jake McKinley and Nathan Toepfer.?Will Thompson is the asst.director.?And let me tell you, he is one pain in the asst.I need to make out the rehearsal schedule and make final plans for 29 cast members to attend the banquet Wednesday night with about 50 Korean war veterans from Korean War Veterans Association Chapter 293 and a chapter from Mobile.?Because so many people were willing to pay their own way, I didn't have to put a limit on it, so everyone who wanted to go to the dinner Wednesday night is going!?Sweet!?Alright, to work to work, high ho, high ho, it's off to work I go.?I paid my buck, I need some luck, high ho, high ho, high...hey!?Ho!?Quit doing them drugs!?They bad for you! |
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